Communication: Techniques to Build Trust and Save Time

A few years ago, I pulled a CEO aside on a Friday afternoon. I told him what I was seeing: “People are scared.”

He hadn’t realized it.

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The problems had been brewing on multiple teams. But no one was saying it clearly. When he heard this, he got it immediately. “Thank you,” he said. “Thank you for telling me the truth.”

That’s all it took. One straight sentence. From there, we could solve the problem together.

Communication can be hard sometimes. It requires honesty. Vulnerability. The willingness to name what you’re actually seeing.

But the good news is that communication is a skill. Which means you can get better at it. I want to share two communication moves that help me and work.

Move 1: Say It Straight, Then Search Together

Use this when you need direct communication to get to the heart of the matter and solve a problem quickly.

First, say the truth plainly. No sugar coating. Just say what you observe: “You rambled in that meeting. You repeated yourself three times. You lost people.” Done. Said it.

People appreciate the honesty because it’s the truth.

Then shift and search. Ask: “How would you do that differently next time?” Now you’re solving and searching for solutions together instead of lecturing.

The power is that you’ve named the reality (straight), and then invited them to solve it (search). Conflict gets resolved fast.

I watched this with a director leading a new project rollout. In the first meeting, she rambled. Filler words everywhere. No structure. The audience checked out.

Afterwards, I told her: “Your opening lost the room. You repeated yourself and used filler words.”

Then: “How could you deliver this more succinctly?”

She knew exactly what to do. She rehearsed. She recorded herself. The second time, she was shorter, clearer, more confident. That’s what happens when you name reality and let people fix it.

Move 2: Get to What People Actually Need

When someone brings you a serious problem (missed margin targets, physician turnover, a board member’s concern) it’s natural to want to avoid it or quicky point blame on someone else.

Don’t. Instead, get curious. Ask diagnostic questions. You’ll discover that the surface problem isn’t the real problem.

I was recently working with a rural health system that was struggling financially. The CEO and senior leadership team kept having the same conversation: margins continued to miss expectations. Physician recruitment was harder than expected. The board was worried.

I sat down with the COO and used a framework from nonviolent communication to understand what was actually happening.

What do you see? “We’ve been recruiting physicians by promising them dedicated OR blocks and new technology. But we’re running a $6 million operating loss. Our state budget guidance just capped our expense growth at zero. We can’t afford the promises we’re making.”

What did you think? “We’re making grand commitments to get people in the door, but we don’t have the capacity to deliver. When those promises fail, we lose trust. And we lose doctors.”

What did you feel? “Anxious. Cornered. We’re being asked to save the hospital’s future while being handcuffed by financial reality. Something has to give.”

What do you actually need? “We need transparency and hard choices. We need to stop trying to be everything to everyone. We need a focused strategy: pick the service lines we can actually win at, and let some things go. Then get the medical staff aligned around that strategy before we make more promises we can’t keep.”

What’s your request? “I request that we create a disciplined 90-day roadmap with clear milestones. And I request that the CEO hold a straight talk forum with the medical staff, laying out the $6 million deficit, explaining the constraints, and reaching consensus on which service lines we’re prioritizing. No more silent misalignment.”

The COO needed the CEO to have a different conversation with the board and the medical staff. He needed structural clarity and honest alignment on strategy. That’s a fixable communication and governance problem.

What Changes When You Communicate This Way

Meetings get shorter. People start bringing you the real problems instead of just venting. You move faster because people know where they stand. They waste less energy on second-guessing or protecting themselves.

Trust also improves. Because they know you’ll tell them the truth, and you actually care about what they need.

Give it a Try This Week

Pick one conversation. Someone on your team. Something that needs to be said but you’ve been softening it.

If it’s a simple communication that could be more effective, try straight talk and search talk.

Say it straight: “Here’s what I’m seeing. Here’s what needs to change.” Then ask: “How do you think we fix this?”

If it’s a messy problem you’d prefer to avoid, use the nonviolent communication framework and diagnostic questions from Move 2.

A remember to pause. Don’t plan your next sentence. Pause and listen to understand what they’re dealing with.

If you want to explore how this applies to your specific situation, reach out.

Onwards!